Miscellaneous Missives

  Molly was excited to get a package from her friend who lives in Alaska.  When she opened the box, she was confused.  Although the shirt was actually soft and of good quality, she was upset by the guns in the flag.  When she googled Holster's, it was exactly what she thought... pro-gun.  She didn't know how to handle the situation, so she sent a picture stating she was confused. Her friend had obviously lost her mind.  During the conversation, she kept proclaiming that she hadn't sent a t-shirt.  When Molly explained it was her writing on the box, things became weird.  The friend was in a state of denial.  Molly even sent a text with a picture of the writing on the box. Molly's friend was adamant that she sent homemade condiments.  She wouldn't give up on her story even though it was clear Molly is in possession of an NRA type t-shirt.  After much deliberation, the two friends realized what had happened.  The original box, wit...

Although Amanda had been doing most of her cooking and eating at home, she realized she still had apples in her crisper drawer.  Knowing they were soft and mushy (overly gross), she knew she needed to get rid of them.  The organic recycling was the obvious choice, but Amanda finds the obvious choices to be boring. Two weeks later, Amanda's sink is clogged on both sides.  After attempting to find the clog by removing and replacing all of the pipes under the sink, she realizes she must call a drain person. Since Amanda is still working at home, making an appointment is easy.   It was great to have the drain person in her house because she used it as an excuse to get out of a meeting break out room.  It, however, became unnerving when the drain person yelled "Damn, I've never seen this before... you have an apple tree growing in your drain."   Amanda knew what to do.  As soon as the drain person left, she emptied her piggy bank into the garbage ...

John is a middle school math teacher nearing retirement and wondering why he doesn't get more respect as a more experienced teacher.  As the quarter ended, he was feeling as though the other teachers weren't taking him seriously.  He started plotting revenge on Monday as his colleagues kept reminding him he must follow the Wednesday deadline for missing work.  "Don't extend it," they taunted repeatedly throughout the week.  By Friday, he had a plan.  He set up a Gmail account that looked like it could have come from the school and emailed all the students reminding them that they could still turn in work for the other classes (all but his).  Of course, he needed to remind them it is best to reach out through a variety of formats reminding them to Google Chat, email, phone, and finally to use the Remind app to text.  To make sure he was going to get the most entertainment out of his stunt, he told them to wait until the last period of the day to start a...

  Maggie, a young teacher in her fifth year of teaching and a rule follower, finally had enough today.  She's well aware that it's difficult for everyone to stay at home during COVID, but today was it!  Being aware of the condo association by-laws, she figured today was the day to help her neighbors.  First, in the middle of a meet with her juniors, she went outside to warn a neighbor that they needed to keep their dog on its leash.  Yes, she should have been doing a better job of teaching instead of looking out the window at the snow and neighbors, but she wants a safe neighborhood.  Someone needs to help other abide by the laws.  Next, over her lunch break, she took a walk and noticed someone putting their recycling in the trash.  Marching up to this rule breaker, she firmly shared her knowledge of trash vs. recycling.  On her way back to her being locked inside teaching, she saw someone else with a dog off leash.  This has to stop she...

 Sally and Samantha host an online cooking club each Wednesday.  Although Sally is used to sixth graders and their antics, Samantha can't really stand the sixth graders.  Today silly Sidney came to cooking club on her skates (inline).  While she knew it was absolutely wrong and had serious implications, Samantha saw some humor in Sidney spilling scalding water on herself since she was skating around the kitchen.  Even though it might sabotage her career, she kept seeing this over and over in her had.  Simultaneously she knew her sadism was not worth sacrificing her job.   It was a sensitive issue.  Should she suggest silly Sidney remove the skates?

  Lauren visited with her lovely dog LuLu to take a walk around Lyla's neighborhood. Lyla and LuLu had taken many walks up and down the tracks behind Lyla's house.  LuLu is a lab and loves to roam. With the new light rail construction, both Lauren and Lyla tried to walk LuLu away from the construction.  LuLu wasn't having it.  In fact, LuLu wouldn't even wear the leash that Lauren had brought.  Since LuLu was obviously the leader. The walk lingered down the construction.  It was a glorious leisurely meandering that ended back at the start. Today officers knocked on Lyla's door.  She tried to explain that it wasn't her dog.  The officers would listen to no arguments and lingered at Lyla's much of the day waiting for LuLu to appear. Lyla offered lingonberry jam.  One of the officers was extremely allergic and left laughing...  It seems he lacked the fortitude to do anything about the problem but seemed to love lounging at Lyla's house. Lyl...

Molly has lucky game day socks.  As she wore them yesterday watching a big Wild Card game.  The results were once again amazing.  No one thought her team would win, but they did. Today she put on the socks she received for giving blood.  Something crazy happened.  The blood sucker people (thank you for all you do), called to thank her for all of the recommendations and all the people who had made a pledge to give blood.  There were so many that they opened the office today for people to come give blood.  It was weird because she hadn't even left her house.   As she looked down at her socks, she realized what was happening...   Does the magic come from her feet or the socks?  Wbat if...

Carl always looks forward to his Friday Fun Day morning advisory group.  He leads the quiet group where kids color, draw, journal, and then share their work with others.  One of Carl's colleagues continually makes fun of Carl and his coloring skills.  Today, however, when he shared his coloring with the students, they thought it was amazing. This gave Carl and idea.  He could quit his job sitting in front of a computer and make a career out of coloring.  Carl sat down with his Crayons and wrote to the Crayola corporation in Easton, Pennsylvania.  Obviously, an email wouldn't do. He's waiting to hear back.  Are big changes on Carl's horizon?

  Donna is enjoying working from home.  She's an accountant with Target corporate and has not yet returned to her office.  While she does like being able to help her children with their online schooling without paying a nanny or for daycare, she feels bad for the Target employees still working and interacting with the public.  To support their cause, she's started wearing khaki pants and a red shirt each day.  Unfortunately, that wasn't enough, so she took to Twitter.  At first it was showing support and reminding the red shirt people how much they do to make Target great.  When she didn't feel that was enough, she decided to take it a step further.  The public needs to know of the unfair practices.   Taking to Twitter again, she told of the horrors the Target employees were facing and reminded customers that supporting Target was taking the power away from good people.  All the time she kept asking workers and customers... Should t...

Georgia is having difficulties deciding who should be her "life partner."  She's somewhat fascinated with both men.  One is kind of a red neck and comes from a family of similar personalities (or lack there of).  Around November, however, they started being a bit more accepting of others.  Georgia wonders if it was enough.  The other guy is new to Georgia.  She typically doesn't see his type, but he's refreshing and intelligent.  For some reason she thinks he might be the best for the long term.  Plus the red neck's uncle has been acting crazier than normal lately and is making ridiculous almost threatening calls to folks.  Georgia needs to make a decision.  Although she thought she made one in November, it's January, and the decision must be made.  Who does she choose?   I hope it's not the redneck.

Martin realized that he had made too many purchases from Amazon prime when another email came to his inbox stating that a package was delivered.  "What did I order now?" he thought.  When he was outside, he realize the package, once again, was left in a pile of snow outside the door.  "Damn you Amazon delivery driver!" he yelled at air.  Well, actually, it was not the air, out of nowhere the Amazon delivery driver came from around the corner.  Embarrassed Martin stated that he wasn't really yelling at the present Amazon deliver driver.       "Awesome, because I have another package for you Martin!" chuckled the driver. Suddenly Martin realized the driver was carrying a live trap... a LIVE trap with an Amazon Prime sticker.       "Ok, now I'm losing it," Martin thought, "there's NO way I ordered anything from Amazon that would require a live trap.  The driver laughed, opened the live trap, and let this fox-like critter...

  Katrina was tired of making Google slides, adding to the Google Calendar, updating Google Calendar and preparing for Google Meets in which students only discuss at every opportunity.   She had it.  It was enough.  Let them fight over their favorite character. etc.  She was done.  .... but what should she do?   She starts watching and drawing anime because it's all the students were doing it.  She even made an anime to fit in.  She made a story board and had a wonderful idea which she sent off to the anime site.   The anime publisher said it was not worth it.  The teacher was frustrated because they refused her story while they were talking the importance of teacher's writing.   She decided that she was still not going back to teaching, anime was her thing.  The publisher said she still had a chance if she could follow the Google standards. What are the Google standards?  She tried to share her an...

Sitting watching the Rams' game in her morning workout clothes, Eloise noticed a pungent smell emanating through the room.  "Geeesh... I need to take a shower after this game," she thought.   Feeling fresh after the win and a shower, she sat down to watch the news.  "Is Trump for real?" she asked herself as the smell seemed even more foul.  Was it the television?  Well, that's ridiculous.  Was it the chair (still soaked with her sweat? No.   She ventured toward the organic recycling in the kitchen.  Even the organics were sweet compared to the putrid scent that filled the room.  It seemed concentrated near the door.  That was it... When she opened the door to the deck, she realized the source of the pungent odor.   Now what? Who could she possible contact? 

  While riding her bike on the trainer, the back tire began to shake.  As she continued riding, she realized she was unfortunately not prepared for the weather of the sporting event she found herself trying to get in.  The security guards, however, let her ride her bike into the stadium as long as she had a mask.  Of course she had a mask; she always had a mask.  Automatically, the mask was covering her mouth and nose.  Being impressed with her Iowa Sate University mask, the security guards led her and her bike to the tunnel and let her ride onto the Fiesta Bowl field as Iowa State held up the winning trophy.  It was an amazing event although she was disappointed that Coach Campbell was covered in Gatorade as he reached out to give her a wet, sticky, cold hug.   She tried to run away because it was a bit uncomfortable, unfortunately... And then all of a sudden people were snapping her pictures... pictures of her feet... Was it the game day so...

 What if... My middle school went all in... no teaching online... all in school like we have done in the past. A week after we're back in school, and I've engage 20 kids to actually wear their mask... not hung off one ear, not only covering their mouth, not a fashion neck gear.  I feel like the flu and realize it's only the flu.  I keep teaching until I collapse in front of the class due to asthma type symptoms.  I gasp for students to find my inhaler which is locked in a closet with my backpack and purse.  It could happen or not...